By: Dr. Lynnette Simm
An anniversary is a marker that reminds us to look back and see all we have accomplished since this time last year, as well as a time to look ahead and plan for the future. Our psyche needs rejuvenation, and celebrating has been shown to relax the mind, body and soul. Anniversaries are also acknowledgments of time with our loved ones, spouses, children, family, friends and peers. This collection of relationships is what matters most in life, and we need to focus on them, work to nurture them and treasure them.
When we say anniversary, most people think of weddings or first dates; however, anniversaries can commemorate difficult or tragic times as well. Every year is filled with dates marked with tragedies and blessings for all of us. When we begin recognizing our relationships we begin developing amazing relationships.
This fall also marks my grandmother’s birthday; she’s been gone 14 years now. My beloved aunt’s birthday is this fall, just days after my grandmother’s. She passed away a mere six months ago. It’s another life and relationship filled with so many happy, silly and hilarious memories that are still veiled with a sense of sorrow but yet another anniversary that should have some sense of celebration. We all have those people who have made an indelible mark on our lives. Those people who have challenged us to grow and become better are the very ones we need to remember, and anniversaries are the perfect opportunities to do so. As the memories flood in like waves, our minds are taken back to all that we have learned, and we are renewed.
For me, this coming fall seems to be especially challenging this year. There are so many celebrations that I should be happy for, yet there are so many anniversaries of sadness as well. This September marks five years of friendship with my dear sister-friend, Elle. Unfortunately, I know my time is limited with Elle because she has cancer. This once heartwarming and blessing-filled friendship is being overshadowed by this sense of sadness and grief because of the fast-approaching end date. I want to only remember her amazing and beneficial impact and influence on my life because that is what she deserves to be remembered for, but the ache of my impending loss of her and our friendship makes this anniversary seem so bittersweet. Recognizing the anniversary of our friendship allows me to look back on our time together and review all we have accomplished together. As our lives intertwined through the years, I am thankful for the times we cried together, laughed together and walked the journey of life—and now death—together. I’m reminded of Ecclesiastes 4, “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow…a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”
Yet there are rays of hope this fall too. My older daughter turns 19 and my youngest daughter turns 16; I have been a mom for 19 glorious years…and counting. This is one anniversary that is completely joyous because my daughters only have wonderful futures ahead of them, and we have so many more years to enjoy and look forward to. However, my daughters are growing up and moving forward, which means that soon they’ll be gone from my care and home but not from my heart and prayers.
How do we celebrate those we love, those who have gone and those who have such a bright future ahead of them? We do this by remembering those who have gone, by loving those who are still with us and by loving on those in the next generation. Anniversaries and birthdays give everyone the opportunity to acknowledge those people, to celebrate life and love to appreciate the journey of struggles and blessings. Anniversaries give us time to reflect on our time with these monumental people in our lives and how our relationships with each of these people have changed us. It gives us the opportunity to take stock in where our relationship is and how we can make them better.
These people make our life worth recording, appreciating, celebrating and remembering. Recognizing these special moments in your life allows your mind to review the past, acknowledge all that you have overcome to reach this milestone and to bring hope for what the future holds. Review your relationships. Renew them with gratitude. And celebrate them! As 1 Thessalonians says, “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up!”
Share with me/us your most precious celebration. How and who did you celebrate? How does that person impact your life today?
Dr. Lynnette Simm
Email: Drlms96@gmail.com
Website: DrLynnetteSimm.com
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Dr. Lynnette Simm, who earned degrees in psychology and education, has been an educator for nearly twenty years. She has worked in corporate
training, taught from preschool to graduate school, written curriculum for all age groups, worked on college accreditation, and served as the general
education coordinator at a private college. She has taught in public schools, community college, and private universities. Dr. Simm also worked on
behalf of teachers as she created and facilitated professional development seminars. She has been a professional contributor and freelance editor for
several books.
Dr. Simm has been married over twenty years to her husband, Madison, and they have one daughter in college and another daughter in high school.
They live together with their Golden Labrador, Charlie, in North Dallas, Texas, where she continues her working on her writing. She is the author of And the Day Came, an inspirational memoir published in 2016.